Saturday, September 5, 2009

In order to learn from our elders or from our wise youth, we need to connect intergenerationally.

In order to learn from our elders or from our wise youth, we need to connect intergenerationally.

Versions of this talk were delivered at the National Conference of Black and White Men Together / Men of All Colors Together in Philadelphia, PA on July 29, 2009 and at the plenary session at the LGBTI Health Summit in Chicago, IL on August 16, 2009

By Chris Bartlett

I’m an old-school gay.

I came of age during the height of the AIDS epidemic, when we were burying people every week. Leadership was needed in numerous places, and we can be grateful that many men and women stepped up to lead. Many people in this room know what I am talking about. At that time, I was lucky to be a part of ACT UP Philadelphia and I had the great blessing to be part of an intergenerational group of men and women who believed strongly in not only fighting for people with AIDS, but also for people of color, and women, and immigrants rights, and a woman’s right to choose abortion, and for poor people everywhere. So I was taught to lead out of that context—with a big picture attitude that did not view LGBT people as something unique- we were just one of the many targets in a great tradition of American oppression.

What did I learn about leadership from ACT UP Philly? I learned that leadership is largely claimed, not given. I learned that effective leaders are powerful listeners- they’re able to understand the needs both of individuals and groups. I learned to listen to my elders- and to have them teach me everything they knew. I learned to celebrate the passion of youth—their incredible diversity of vision—and their ability to think outside the box. And I learned to appreciate the adults in ACT UP—the men and women who paid the bills, made sure the doors were open, welcomed and blessed the youth, and included and celebrated the elders. ACT UP gave me all of that—and twenty years later, I am still friends with many of the men and women I met in those rooms.

From that incredible experience, forged in the fire of the AIDS Crisis, I saw what worked, and I learned consequently about the power of leadership and how to cultivate it. Out of those lessons, and from many since, I know now that the number one challenge we face in LGBT leadership is our inability to successfully pass our history, traditions, ethical culture, and racial and social justice legacy from elders to adults to youth. Intergenerational transmission of culture and history. How many people outside this room know that BWMT conducted bar surveys to document racism in local gay bars? How many people outside of this room know that LGBT people have been at the forefront of health activism for generations, or how many people outside of this room, or even within it, remember all of the movement leaders who have died from disease, or poverty, or old age? How many of us know what Barbara Giddings stood for, or why Essex Hemphill matters? I’m not asking these questions as a trivia game. But I do wonder how our leaders can do their jobs powerfully when they don’t always know the lessons and strategies that were honed by those in generations before them.

In order to learn from our elders or from our wise youth, we need to connect intergenerationally. We queer folks have a challenge connecting intergenerationally. We’re fearful of being tagged as chicken hawks (if we’re older) or gold diggers (if we’re younger). We don’t know where or how to meet men of other generations. Once we do meet, we’re often unsure how to get past sexual energies, attractions, romantic interest. Intergenerational friendships require stretching our comfort zone a bit.

But I’m telling you now- in order for us to succeed in the next fifty years, every man and woman in this room must take the lead in connecting intergenerationally. This is no longer optional. Each of us must be willing to claim our unique role in the movement, and share what we know with others of all ages. We must connect both with those who are older, and those who are younger. It is a two way street.

But first of all, you need to understand where you are yourself.

Youth. Adult. Elder. Or Ancestor.

Once you know what you consider yourself (and it is simply a matter of claiming that category)--- you can go about thinking about how you will connect with the other categories.

Here are some suggestions for leaders;

1. If you are a youth, learn about adulthood from an adult. If you are an adult, learn about elderhood from and elder, and if you are an elder, learn about ancestorship from an ancestor.

2. Secret mentorship- make a list of men and women you can be of service to

3. Create a ritual of adulthood – a gay bar mitzvah

4. Create a ritual of elderhood

5. Creatie opportunities for adults and elders to bless the youth—three times. If you are not blessing the youth, you are cursing them.

6. Create opportunities for youth and adults to honor the elders

7. Document your history—put it on the web where everyone can find it

8. Create opportunities for celebrating the elder role—show younger gay men that they can become elders, not just olders.

Intergenerational connection is not rocket science, but it does require using our imagination to interact in new ways. To create opportunities that might have been invisible in the past. That is the work of visionary leadership at this time. I do want to acknowledge the powerful leadership in this room for doing much of this work already. I know you are doing it, because you have been doing your incredible work for more than three decades.

I want to acknowledge you for your leadership in taking a stand for LGBT liberation—looking at the intersection between LGBT struggles and the other significant civil rights struggles of people of color, women, trans people, etc. This breadth of vision provides opportunities for a diversity of populations in your work.

I want to acknowledge the incredible leadership in this room, because this is one of the places that you are making leadership work—otherwise you wouldn’t still be here. But I suspect that you know there are areas for growth—creating space for youth, solidifying the job descriptions for adults, and more fully accessing the benefits to be provided by elder participation. Perhaps you see new opportunities for intergenerational dialogue, or for mentoring someone younger or older. My one request is that each of you leave today feeling inspired to break down the intergenerational divide in your own life. If you’re already doing this—take the next step. Show someone else how to do it. Create a conversation that courageously explores our fears of each other.

I said earlier that this work is not optional. Why? Because the first generation of LGBT liberation activists is in their 50s, 60s, and 70s. If we “ancestor” them out of the movement—by that I mean close off their possibilities for ongoing participation, we do a disservice to LGBT folks of all generations. Youth and adults will see what is in store for them down the line, and if they are smart, would take their organizing energies elsewhere. If we don’t bless our youth and provide them opportunities for leadership, If we don’t support our adults and connect them to youth and elders, they will likely burnout and move on.

But if each of you in this room takes on the task of intergenerational connection and transmission of history and traditions, we can expect that both youth and adults will jump into the work and fun of LGBTI Health, secure in the knowledge that there is a lifetime of possibility.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Out In Front Co-Chair Receives Leadership Award

Out In Front Co-Chair Lonnie Lusardo receives Leadership Tomorrow Award. Read his remarks here:

It is fitting to celebrate this event at Woodland Park Zoo. This is where they send you after serving 7 years on the LT Board. The zoo staff couldn't decide whether I belonged with the Tasmanian Devil or the American Wild Ass.

I am deeply and profoundly moved, honored, and humbled to receive this award.

I share this award with every Leadership Tomorrow graduate and anyone who has ever sat on a nonprofit board, volunteered in support of their community, or has ever danced on the desk of a dense decision maker. To be LT's Standard Bearer for 2009 is an awesome responsibility, one I take very seriously. I hold this award for all of us -- proudly and humbly.

I DEDICATE this award to my family - to my late immigrant Italian parents, who taught me the values I live by: hard work, loyalty, and speaking freely - even when there's a foot in my mouth -- and to my three brothers, Frank, Fred, and Roger. Tonight I am enormously grateful to introduce my brother Frank and his wife Ginny and my brother Roger, all of whom came here from Florida to share this moment with me.

For the past 20 years, I have been a tireless Cheerleader for Leadership Tomorrow. LT is as close to a religion as I get. Aside from the challenging curriculum, LT gave me the self-confidence to do things for the communities I care about with more passion and intention-- and with my entire heart and soul.

My quest for social justice and human rights comes on the backs of people of color who have led the way for me. I assure you my goal is to build on the achievements of men and women of color and white women, not to diminish their work or in any way impact their progress.

Tonight I trumpet the cause that has taken much of my attention for the past six years -- Out In Front, a program shamelessly modeled after LT. I commend Michael Auch (LT 96), who helped craft the concept, Marsha Botzer (LT ) from the OIF Steering Committee and Mike Schaefer from Program Development who cultivated even more community support. In two days, Out In Front celebrates the end of our pilot project and graduates our first class of 15 remarkably inspired leaders.

Our focus is finely targeted. The OUT IN FRONT Mission is to foster the development of effective, engaged, and passionate leaders in order to build a thriving Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Community. Our Vision is a strong LGBT community with equality that supports, nurtures and protects its diverse members and organizations. We do this with four values: Inclusion, Relevance, Inspiration, and Accountability.

Tonight I am not only a professional who happens to be gay - that I do every day. As such, I blend in with all rest of humanity. Tonight, I am your professional homosexual. The difference is an inescapable exposure and, to some extent, risk.

As you think of Out In Front, you may ask, “
Why a leadership program for sexual minorities when we already have LT, Project Lead, the Asian Community Leadership Foundation, etc.?”

Here's why…

Because without equality, our dignity is beneath that of the majority culture. We are NOT treated as equals because the law does not recognize us as equals. Many gay people, myself among them, dislike talking about our sexual orientation in public, especially through the media. Talking about my sexual orientation makes me exceedingly uncomfortable. But I refuse to live a lie. I have to be true to myself. You can't inspire policy change from behind a closet door. We have to constantly dispel stereotypes and myths.

Why leadership for sexual minorities?
It took me 10 long and painful years to acknowledge my sexual orientation TO MYSELF. Through most of high school, four years in the US Navy, and my first few years of college, I felt alone, rejected, confused, and constantly surrounded by shame. During that time same sex couples demonstrating any open display of affection were an invitation for brutality.

How can a loving person maintain dignity by hiding her or his true emotions? You cannot. In the face of questioning friends, colleagues, and coworkers, and family - sometime we deny, we hide, we change the pronouns when talking about a date, or we just flat out lie. In the 60s and 70s, such behavior was routine. Contrary to popular opinion, the cultural dynamics in today's workplace are not much different than 30 years ago.

In short, being gay is not for sissies.
All of those years, before I realized it was no longer just a ophase, I honestly envisioned a future with a wife, kids, and a house in the suburbs. Even after I was able to deal with the issue in my heart and soul, it took another 20 years to come out to my family.

The internalized conflicts we cope with our entire lives is why we need a different leadership roadmap than our non-gay peers. Our issues are different. Our culture is different. Our institutions are different. To many of us, fairness and equality is a matter of life or death. At the federal level, we can stIll be fired without cause -- simply for being gay.

We have to catalog our own destiny.

Today the Obama Administration is struggling to extend partnership rights to federal workers. Even a toe in the water triggers a tidal wave against it. If federal employees can't be seen as equals, forget dismantling Don't' Ask, Don't Tell - a policy that is tantamount to government-enforced lying - a personal violation of honesty and integrity, basic human values to most Americans.

We need a leadership program for sexual minorities because if the most progressive presidency in the nation's history can't provide “Liberty and Justice for all…” who can?

One big stumbling block to the president is The Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) passed by Congress in 1996 to define marriage as only between a man and a woman. Tell me how this law contributes to “…life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness?” Where did Congress get the power to legislate who loves whom?

DOMA must be abolished. It is the first law ever designed to
take rights away from a specific group of Americans. If that's not discrimination, what is?

The fear behind DOMA is reinforced whenever legislators, journalists, and opponents of fairness insist upon using the phrases “gay marriage” or “same-sex marriage” rather than MARRIAGE EQUALITY. Sexual Minorities do not ask for special rights. We expect and deserve EQUAL rights. Doesn't “…Liberty and Justice for ALL” mean something?”

The fears are false. Sexual Orientation is not a threat to the institution of marriage. The real threats to marriage are INFIDELITY and DIVORCE. Sexual Orientation is not a threat to the military. Real threats to the military are WAR and TORTURE.

Why a leadership program for sexual minorities? Because our state is now facing another battle against sexual minorities -- Initiative 71 -- (the referendum to put Washington State's new domestic partners law to a public vote). PLEASE DELCINE TO SIGN the initiative. Sen. Murrary and Rep. Pederson ahve worked too hard to lose ground to bigots and hatemongers.

When LGBT and Questioning students in middle schools and high schools are subjected to bullying and text books that fail to tactfully acknowledge LGBT history (as anything more than a footnote) - we need skilled leaders in organizations like the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) and the Safe Schools Coalition to push for justice and equality.

Why a leadership program for sexual minorities? When we consider fair health care options and public funding to help people living with HIV/AIDS, the staff and Board at Lifelong AIDS Alliance, AIDS Housing of Washington, Dunshee House, and other AIDS Service Organizations need trained and passionate leaders to navigate through the political maze, and through a highly diverse community in order to raise public awareness and manage a devastating epidemic.

These are just a few of the organizations that need knowledgeable and skilled leaders to ensure the survival of the next generation.

That's why we need a leadership program for sexual minorities.

And that's why I am committing the $1,000 contribution that accompanies the Carlson Award to a Scholarship Fund for Out In Front. My hope is that no individual with a passion to fight for social justice - and who goes through our rigid selection process -- may be denied because of a lack of resources to pay for tuition.

Thank you for this incredible honor.


Monday, June 29, 2009

Thank you for attending our Celebration!

Thanks to everyone who attended our Graduation Celebration last Thursday evening. We had a great time honoring our graduates and spreading the word about Out In Front.

If you were unable to make a contribution at the event and wish to do so, you can send a check to our fiscal sponsor, Equal Rights Washington. Be sure to include "Out In Front" in the memo line of your check and make it out to Equal Rights Washington.

Mail checks to:

Out In Front
c/o Equal Rights Washington

PO Box 12216,
Seattle, WA 98102

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Graduation Celebration!

Join Out In Front and Senator Ed Murray to celebrate the completion of our pilot leadership training program. Fifteen rising LGBTQ leaders completed five months of classroom training, mentoring and team projects. Meet these graduates and learn about this exciting new effort to ensure the continued strength of our community.

Out In Front’s Graduation Celebration!

June 25th
6:00, brief program at 6:30
Greg Kucera Gallery in Pioneer Square
212 Third Avenue South
rsvp to: outinfrontseattle@gmail.com

hors d'oeuvres, wine and beer provided

There is no fee to attend this event. A contribution request will be made.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Out In Front Participants Spend Day with Legislators

Participants in Out In Front, Seattle’s first LGBT Leadership Training Program, learned the ins and outs of the political process from Washington’s LGBT Senators, Representatives and lobbyists at a special training session at the state capitol on March 27th. Through Steering Committee member Senator Ed Murray’s support of Advocacy Day, the class gained hands-on experience with creating effective public policy.

Out In Front launched Seattle’s first leadership training program specifically for our Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer communities in January. After thorough research and intergenerational collaboration, a class of sixteen promising leaders has begun learning what it takes to be an inclusive, relevant, inspiring and accountable leader.

The class includes participants with a variety of backgrounds. Cody Pherigo, a Peer Advisory Committee member for SHIFT: A Peer Recovery Network, who is forming a new sober support group for trans-masculine individuals. In addition, JT Thompson owns the business, Sweet Posie Catering, and is active in his faith community, Liberation Ministries. Genessa Krasnow, a creative strategist, recently acted as Artistic Director of the Dalai Lama’s “Seeds of Compassion” event and Erick Seelbach is Director of Prevention, Education, and Public Policy at Lifelong AIDS Alliance.
Other participants are: Broch Bender, Donna Dover, Steve Gibbs, Adam Kuglin, Tyler Juel, Keith McDaniel, Kyler Powell, Chad Ryan, Thomas Schmitt, Jennifer Theissing, Brett Turrell and Evan Hunter Wright.
The 2009 training series kicked off on February 18th at Starbucks International Headquarters with an orientation and reception. The pilot program consists of five sessions including an overnight retreat, one-on-one mentoring, a team project and a graduation celebration.
The first classroom session was hosted by Antioch University on February 28th. The day focused on defining leadership and LGBT community history. Tony Krebs gave a presentation based on his partner Gary Atkin’s landmark book, Gay Seattle. The training also included a review of local LGBT rights activism from the long-time activist Charlie Brydon. The class gave outstanding reviews of the session. One participant, Brett Turrell, a manager at Metropolitan Market and volunteer with Camp Ten Trees, expressed, “what’s most exciting, is that this program is being proactive in passing along knowledge and skills to the next generation of LGBTQ leaders”.
Throughout the program, each Out In Front participant is paired with a community leader including State Representative Jaime Pedersen, Seattle City Councilmember Tom Rasmussen, Sue Eastgaard, Director of the Youth Suicide Prevention Program and Lisa Hjorten, CEO of Informia.
Other mentors are: Tim Bradbury, former King County Superior Court Judge; Kevin Carothers, Starbucks; Elaine DuCharme, Attorney at Law; John Farris, SAAS Marketing; Gary Fuller, Nyhus Communications; Audrey Haberman, Pride Foundation; David Jayo, REI; Ann McGettigan, Seattle Counseling Service; Tina Podlodowski, Big Brothers, Big Sisters; David Richart, Lifelong AIDS Alliance; Fred Swanson, Gay City; Connie Watts, Equal Rights Washington; and David Wertheimer, Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation.

In addition to leadership, history and advocacy, Out In Front’s Pilot Program will cover cultural competency, community collaborations, non-profit board functions and organizational sustainability. This 2009 pilot program also includes a process to measure the results of a limited curriculum. Out In Front has plans to launch an enhanced nine-month program.